6 Signs of a Healthy Conscious Partnership

In the month of February, the sun goes into gate 30 around the time of Valentine’s Day (this year, in 2025, it starts on February 13th, and is in gate 30 until February 17th), which is a solar plexus energy all about the burning, passionate, romantic desire to feel. This month is all about nurturing your relationships and understanding how your relationships are impacting your life. Are your relationships feeling supportive or are they not?

Although Valentine’s Day has become very commercialized, the root of it is this energy of gate 30, of wanting to feel life more deeply. During this time, we naturally want to feel more in love with our lives and with our parters. There’s so much consciousness we can bring into any relationship, whether romantic or not. We like to use human design as a lens that can help liberate you within your relationships, and empower you to bring consciousness to any relationship that you want to see flourish. Personally in our lives, we both use human design on a daily basis to navigate our relationships, and we want to share what we have learned throughout the years.

We are all here to connect, to give, and to receive from the world around us, and having consciousness on how you show up for yourself and others is so important. We can focus on these 6 ideals to enhance and improve the quality of any relationship.

It is the most crucial thing that you enter into relationships and partnerships correctly, using your Strategy and Authority. If you are new to human design and you aren’t sure how to follow your strategy and authority, our book, Your Human Design is a great resource to get started. By following your Strategy and Authority, you increase your magnetism and put yourself in the right place at the right time to find the relationships that are aligned and correct for you.

As a disclaimer, we don’t like to use human design for match making, and we don’t believe in using a system to define you or put limits on your authority. We really believe that when you use your authority and listen to your body, you will always be led to what is in alignment for you.

So what are the 6 signs of a conscious partnership? Let’s dive into it!

THE 6 SIGNS OF A CONSCIOUS PARTNERSHIP:

Having Individual Responsibility

It’s important that both individuals are committed to their wholeness. This doesn’t mean that if you are working on yourself and your partner isn’t, that you need to force them to do the work as well. Instead, really ask yourself, are you comfortable on your own? Do you follow your own interests outside of your relationship, and are you committed to your own growth?

Understanding who you are as an individual, what is right for you, what isn’t right for you, what you love about yourself, what you’re working on and trying to grow, is the biggest gift that you can give to your partner, because you are taking care of your side of the street. You’re not forcing others to be like you, or putting your own trauma onto them. You are in charge of your own happiness and wholeness, and in turn, it allows you to hold space for others to do the same.

In a healthy conscious partnership, you know who you are and you are committed to yourself just as much as you are committed to the other person. Instead of losing yourself in the partnership and making the other person the answer to your happiness, you can use tools and modalities like human design to help you discover your truths and who you really are as an individual. This can help you to connect with your purpose. You can use human design to help you take ownership of your life and strive to live the most authentic version of yourself. This is the foundation of having a beautiful and harmonious conscious energy in your partnerships.

Committing to Being a Team

This means being committed to seeing all of life’s challenges as a team effort. It’s important to be able to set your ego aside and choose to work together, not to avoid supporting your partner when they are going through a challenging experience. You must be committed to supporting each other and moving through things together.

This doesn’t mean it’s always your responsibility to do things for your partner, or to show up for your partner. Sometimes it’ll feel right for you to show up, and other times it’ll feel right for you to simply hold space for them, based on what your inner authority is guiding you towards. You don’t even necessarily have to talk about how you will support each other all the time. Sometimes it’s just knowing that you hold space for each other. You know what the other person needs in difficult moments and you naturally support them in a way that feels good to both of you.

Being on the same team means that you have a love and dedication for each other in your heart, caring about what the other is going through, and understanding that when they rise, you rise.

Honoring Each Other's Inner Authority

In a relationship, you may have a tendency to want to control your partner or steer them in the direction that you think is right for them. However that is not the healthy way to thrive in a relationship. It’s really about letting the other person trust in their inner authority and letting that guide their way, and learning to support them in that.

We genuinely think that knowing how your partner’s inner authority works and supporting them in using their authority is the greatest love language of all time. When your partner comes to you with a challenge they are facing, it’s important to feel into if it’s correct for you to give them advice, or if you need to simply support them and be a grounding force, and helping them to find their own truth.

What if our authorities want different things?

You may run into times when your inner authorities are wanting different things, such as moving to a new area. What do you do if one person’s authority says yes and the other person’s authority says no? It’s so important to take the other person’s truth into consideration and to not avoid it. We want to empower them to be in alignment and be their own inner authority before pleasing us.

When making a decision together, continue weighing your options and breaking down the decision into smaller pieces, until you reach alignment between the both of you. Perhaps you will consider moving to this new area, as long as you have space for a garden in your back yard. It’s important to find the common ground between your authorities, so that both people feel like the decision is in alignment with their inner authorities.

If you’re struggling to agree, you can say to yourself: if this is a yes for my partner, what is needed in order for this to feel like a yes for me? You can hone in on your authority and break things down past any fears that might be coming up.

If this is something you’re facing right now, we have a mini course in our HD Besties Membership called Authority Hang Ups. In this course, you will learn the different hang ups you might run into when making big decisions, and will receive tips on how to find clarity when you run into these issues. Check out all the perks of our HD Besties Membership below!

Allowing Your Partner's Evolution

A healthy partnership is when you are committed to being present with one another as you both evolve. It’s knowing that you will not be who you are today for the rest of your life, and neither will your partner. The things you’re experiencing right now are not the things you’ll be experiencing forever. Holding space for your own evolution and your partner’s evolution is so important. It’s about getting curious about who your partner is today, and not checking out or becoming complacent, and assuming that you know everything there is to know about that person.

It’s important not to go into autopilot mode, and instead to develop a conscious relationship where you are allowing space for that evolution and growth, having curiosity, and growing throughout the years together. You will feel the most loved and seen when your partner celebrates and values your evolution and becomes curious about your growth. It’s so important to be each other’s cheerleaders in life.

Growing outside of the relationship is important as well. It’s important to allow the polarity of evolving on your own, and letting the other person witness and share in that growth, and to also prioritize experiences that help you evolve together in a partnership. To have shared experiences that are new, and bring a new sense of intimacy, depth and playfulness to your relationship.

Radical Honesty and Loving Communication

In a healthy partnership, it is vital to speak your truth with radical honesty, in a way that comes from the heart. In order to be honest, you have to know what your own truth is. Human design can help you to become really clear about what your authority is saying, what is right and not right for you, and can ultimately show you who you truly are.

When you want to speak up around a difficult subject, be conscious of if you are speaking from your not self, or from fear, or conditioning, or even from your mind, instead of from your highest self. This can distort the way that we communicate to our partner. If you aren’t aware of when your not self is speaking, it makes it hard to communicate in an authentic, honest, and loving way. Being radically honest requires a lot of courage. Having awareness around the things you are saying or doing, and owning when you are living in your not self is also a part of radical honesty.

It’s also important to know your emotional center dynamics in a partnership, whether you have a defined solar plexus or an undefined solar plexus. Are you speaking from an emotion that you’re amplifying, or are you speaking from an emotional high or low? All of this requires awareness, but it’s so important not to hold back from speaking your truth even when it’s hard or scary.

For example, when you’re on a low in your emotional wave you will feel like you want to say things that are not your truth at all. It can feel like you want to unleash and say something that you don’t mean. You might even create problems when there are none, because you are trying to pin point why you are on a low. If you simply have awareness of your emotional wave, it can completely change the way you deal with these feelings, and you can then show up with vulnerability and truth, and your partner will understand you on a deeper level.

It’s important to first understand your authority, who you are, what your gifts are, and to observe what it is that you are actually feeling. If you show up with vulnerability when communicating with your partner, it will eventually come to a place of love, kindness and understanding. They will feel like they can support you and be on your team because you aren’t pushing them away with your words. Vulnerability will always bring people in with your words. There is a rawness and realness that cannot be judged or faked. It just is.

Showing up with vulnerability will actually show your partner your confidence, because you aren’t afraid to speak your truth, even when it is hard. It will always bring more depth to your relationship. By not speaking up and being vulnerable, we are actually creating walls between ourselves and our partners. The more vulnerable we can be, the more we can shatter those walls and remove that distance. Voicing difficult feelings with vulnerability diffuses that tension between you.

If you are in a relationship where you feel like you aren’t heard, go back through the previous steps we mentioned above, and take accountability for your own energy. Dive into really understanding yourself, seeing yourself, and loving yourself, and in turn, others will see you this way too.

Accepting Each Other's Differences

Ra Uru Hu said “If you allow someone to be who they are, and they allow you to be who you are, then that’s love. Anything else is torture.” We really resonate with that and believe in that. It can feel scary to allow someone to be fully who they are if they are different than you, especially if you started the relationship by connecting over your similarities. Honoring and understanding your human design will allow you to understand how you’re different from others and how they are different from you. This will always naturally foster a love between two people.

Maybe you and your partner are on different paths right now, or navigating different challenges, or maybe you’re at different levels of awareness, or navigating different desires for self growth. And that’s okay. You don’t have to be climbing the same exact step with your partner in order to be growing in the same direction. It’s important to accept the fact that you’re here to grow in different ways, and that you’re only accountable for your own growth, your own design, and honoring your own truth.

We think acceptance can actually be another word for love. It’s allowing someone to be who they are, seeing and celebrating who they are, even when it’s different than you or even when it’s challenging. At the end of the day, that is what we all crave from one another. We all want to be seen for who we really are. We want to be loved and accepted for who we really are.

Sometimes the people that we feel most comfortable with end up being the people we feel the most comfortable judging or quieting their experience because theres a level of comfortability. It’s really important to bring back this divine sacred intention of completely loving someone for exactly who they are without wanting to intervene or change them,  and instead wanting to water their essence and root for them as they grow. This is such a beautiful way to live life, and the more you focus on giving this loving and accepting energy to other people, the more you open up that channel to receive that same level of acceptance and self love back.

Relationships can be like a mirror. They will illuminate the things in you that are not yet healed. Almost all of these points we’ve talked about require an internal connection to yourself. They require self love and acceptance. It’s really challenging to fully accept someone else if you haven’t accepted yourself. It’s really challenging to communicate authentically and vulnerably if you’re not aware of what your truth is. These 6 points will show you the work you have to do within, so you can show up authentically in this conscious, connected relationship.

Want more support in your relationship from a human design perspective? Check out our printed personalized charts! We like to keep one for us and one for our partner in our home to refer back to. It’s such a great resource to have on hand, to continue learning about each other, growing together, and loving and accepting each other’s truths.

If you are looking for more support in honoring each other's design and understanding your unique connection, book a couple's reading with us!